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They are forever free who renounce all selfish desire
and break away from the ego-cage of “I’, “me”, and
“mine” to be united with the Lord.
The Bhagavad Gita – Translated by Eknath Easwaran
Control of consciousness is not easily accomplished, if it were
we would have a world of peace and plenty. Instead it takes
great effort to navigate through our own thoughts, filtering
them and learning to listen to the constructive rather than
destructive guidance.
Many would ask - how I am to know if I am listening to my
ego or my Divine guidance when my head is filled with an
endless loop of confusion? I would suggest writing down what
you are thinking and you will know in short order who is talking.
The domain of the ego is the missteps and sins of the past
and the fears and potential pitfalls of the future, or surprisingly
at times, the positive future possibilities if only we are able
to make a few major adjustments now.
By recording the endless loop of advice you will become aware
of a neurotic stream of consciousness working both positive
and negative reinforcement to mold your behavior. Notice
the ego does not function well when you start to meditate
and practice mindfulness and establish yourself in the present.
I find myself most vulnerable to ego control and impact when
I am tired, frustrated, and/or disappointed with my life or when
my defenses are not well fortified such as when waking up in the
morning. I often wake up to a series of major issues in my life
that my ego feels I have not properly addressed or attended
to along with a list of potential problems for the day.
In the past I have gotten caught up answering the "what if"
questions of my early morning interrogator, now instead
I usually Golden Key each asking for God to handle, focus
on my breathing, and center my thinking on positive aspects
of my life. When not successful I get up and start my day.
One such morning, Tuesday February 24, 2009 when I had
obviously not been successful with managing my ego, I was
offered the following meditation guidance during my morning
commute on the train to assist me with regaining my balance.
Where Are You?
You are fighting a war with your negative mind centered
in the ego. You are back again rethinking, judging,
determining, and feeding perceptions and the pain-body.
You are in a pit and you need to mentally climb out and
find hope and enthusiasm.
If you are angry – scream. If you are sad then cry.
If you are confused seek clarity. You are no longer on
the path – you are filling up with fear and self-criticism
and you must return to love and self-acceptance.
Go inside and try to understand the emotions that
are leading you in this direction. Ask what it is that you
need, what is it that you want. Try to rest for with rest
comes strength. Be gentle with yourself and loving.
You do not need to meet others expectations – stop
trying to please and instead seek your own pleasure –
your own needs and wants. Rest and reflect. There is
no need for perfection. Accept the flow of energy and
look for enthusiasm. Move out of depression and into
the joy of enthusiasm.
NOE BY G. 2.24. 2009
It is obvious that I was not doing well on this morning
commute. As you can see this is definitely advice from
my spiritual mind, Divinely connected, not my ego.
Notice the advice and its positive and loving guidance
trying to revive me and bring me back to life.
Meet Your Pain-Body
You will notice a reference to my “Pain-Body” – a term
introduced by Eckhart Tolle, spiritualist and best-selling
author of The Power Of Now and The New Earth who
I have referenced in Chapter Three of THE CRYSTAL PATH -
BOOK ONE OF THE FINDING GOD ON THE TRAIN STORY –
New Thought Yesterday and Today regarding his ground
breaking internet sessions with Oprah Winfrey.
This Chapter is available on the right hand side
of the blog.
The pain-body is the collective manifestation of all
the pain, misery, and sorrow a person has ever gone
through in their entire life. Added to this is the inherited
pain from a person’s culture and family. Using the Toltec
approach regarding the passing of the societal dream
we spoke of earlier, the Toltec’s would say that we have
learned to dream the dream of the collective pain
of our people, culture, religion, or nation.
Tolle goes on to explain that our pain-body's exist just
beneath the surface of our consciousness and when
connected by the loss of hope, depression, or an intense
negative situation they literally move in to take over our
consciousness.
The personality of the pain-body is all negative, misery
driven and feeds on increasing its store of pain rather
than lessening it. The pain-body in control is often like
the drunk in a bar looking for a fight who seems to enjoy
having the life kicked out of them. In fact pain-bodies
are like pain vampires who thrive on more pain - gaining
energy from destruction and as a result become stronger.
The amount of pain you are carrying depends on the amount
of pain you have been subjected to. Tolle says that when our
wonderful lover turns mean and cruel for no reason we are
meeting their pain-body.
Having survived a difficult childhood I am extra cautious when my
pain-body surfaces and have been able to push it back down with
a good nights sleep. Ann says my entire facial expression changes,
my brow furrows; my smile disappears as all the world becomes
extremely negative and hopeless for me. Although I know when
I have slipped into my pain-body it takes focused positive mental
effort to get out. Ann and I can recognize each other’s pain-body
and when they surface we will cautiously tell the other that they
have slipped into their pain-body.
I believe those who are clinically depressed or self-destructive have
been captured by their pain-body and cannot get out until it is too
late, when the crime or life destruction has taken place. I can only
imagine the amount of crime that is the direct responsibility of this
phenomenon with the Defense Attorney making a point that the
defendant was not himself or herself when committing the act.
Collectively whole nations have slipped into their collective
pain-body and like Nazi Germany have used it to create hell on
earth. I implore you to get to know your pain-body and do everything
possible to keep it in check and diffuse it in your life.
To mange my pain-body I use the releasing technique I discussed
on my early posts outlined in the The Sedona Method by Hale
Dwoskin. It is an excellent method for releasing your pain-body
or any unwanted emotion or feeling on a daily basis or when you
realize you are being impacted.
I also strongly encourage you to read Eckhart Tolle’s excellent
handling of this pain-body concept in his books The Power
Of Now and The New Earth.
Here is my poetic interpretation of my pain-body, which, I think
brings home the point and offers an approach for releasing it
through positive thought and love.
My Pain-Body
I struggle with the body of pain,
the memories of agony, anxiety, grief,
fear and the cries of a lost child.
This pain-body is enormous -
built limb by limb, trauma by trauma,
insult by insult,
into a sculpture of wailing moments,
experienced not forgotten –
alive and hungry for more.
I have pretended that the pain-body
does not exist, worked my
consciousness around it,
carried out the tasks of life
while handling it
like an overstuffed trunk.
The pain-body has never gone away –
it inflicts each breath
and like a parasite sucks joy and
enthusiasm from all life.
All else is crowded into the corner
while the pain-body expands –
day in day out –
it deflates the consciousness,
distorts, warps - each moment
demanding – this tapeworm
grows and feeds on the Soul.
It is time to deflate this illusion of
past memories – step behind
the Wizard of Oz Pain-Body and
let my consciousness take charge –
comfort the lost boy –
and release this pain.
How do I proceed? Moving into the pain
only feeds the beast.
I face the pain, accept it as a living
entity and focus on releasing it –
piece-by-piece – chunk-by-chunk.
I will make it malleable through focusing
on all things positive.
I will lead with love and
kindness and release.
POEM - SPIRITUAL POEM 12.14.2007
WITH LOVE, G.
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